I know that at this point you are too nauseous to even read this, but just power through it - like you always do. I know that your hands are ice cold and a shade too pale. I know that you have to remind yourself to breathe (Take a deep breath as you read this). I know it's hard to concentrate. I know it's hard to focus on anything other than the continuous whirlwind in your head. I know that you're reeling.
I just want to tell you it's okay.
I know that the pressure is building in your head. I know it feels like you're about to explode.
I also know that you're going to be fine and that you probably won't believe me, but that's fine too, because when it does end up being okay, I'm just happy that you will be able to breathe without that massive weight on your chest.
I know that you haven't slept, and that if you have, it wasn't even worthwhile. I know that the thought of eating is unfathomable but I need you to take care of yourself because sometimes you do damage to yourself that can't be undone.
Don't be weighted down by the stress. Don't let those around you weigh you down even further, if they are not understanding. There are those who do understand. Don't feel guilt for feeling, it doesn't matter what you're feeling, you should never feel guilty.
One more thing, it's easy to be cynical, it's easy to be sad, it's easy to want to just lay in bed, it's easy to feel this way. All you can do is, try.
Love Always,
Nicole
Years & Years - Eyes Shut
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